People are corporations, too

Here we see the CEO banksters and carmakers as they appear before Congress. We see them looking Serious and Concerned. We know it’s all part of The Show. We know they have nothing to worry about. They’re only testifying in front of their employees.

The Lunar Adscape

Only 0 shopping days left until Buy Nothing Christmas

OK. You gritted your teeth and made it through Buy Nothing Day without visiting a shopping mall. Now comes the real challenge: Buy Nothing Christmas!

Is such a thing even possible? Scientists in the U.S. have been attempting to answer this important question since the late 1980′s but have been unable to find anyone to volunteer for their studies. Tests on pack rats (using miniature brightly wrapped and beribboned test gifts) have suggested that this particular species, at least, can be trained to resist acquisition frenzy . Researchers say the results can’t be applied to Americans, though, because the rats are not capable of understanding the concept of credit cards and insist on paying cash, bartering, or just plain stealing.

Check out the adbusters website: #occupyxmas.

The rich…won’t YOU help?

I can’t really recommend Reach Out To The Rich as heartily as I would the World Ice Tea Organization, for example. The rich have their charities, too, like the opera and their beloved conservative think tanks.  We must let them use their donations to shelter their income from taxes.  After all, they wrote the tax laws in the first place (and rewrite them every day).  Besides, if they don’t get everything they want they’ll become frustrated and complain that they are the victims of something called “Class Warfare”–a strange form of war that can only be waged by working people and the poor against the rich, never the other way around.

A simple plan

Don’t let them confuse you with all the arcane financial terminology they toss around as generously as unwanted credit card offers.  Terms like derivatives, credit default swaps, or reinsurance, are nothing more than a verbal smokescreen. If a large group of men in suits took away your job, health insurance, pension and life savings, forced you and your family onto the street and then left your home empty and abandoned, you would have no trouble describing what they did to you.

A banker doesn’t have to be incredibly intelligent to steal billions of dollars — just incredibly greedy.